Overwhelmed

Yes, that's what I am, these days. But naturally, considering that we've recently changed cities, switched jobs, and are house-and-car-hunting. Not to forget that it's tax payment time. The backlog of chores is never cleared. There's always something left to be done. This, despite the fact that I took a month off between leaving the previous job and reporting to the new one! I'd planned a million things to refresh myself before I got into the daily grind again, none of which ever happened. There were books to be read, blog posts to be written, swimming to done, massages to be taken, sunsets to be enjoyed, exercise and diet to be planned, trips to be made, and a lot more unwinding to be done. The book I began to read had to be returned to the library since I had to move to another city. The blog posts required an Internet connection; the cyber cafe I visited had keyboards from hell. I went for swimming one evening and caught a bad cold the very next day. The massage sessions were to be abandoned abruptly since the cold was followed by a bout of fever. By the time I finished the days' chores, I was too tired to drag myself to the rooftop to watch the sunsets. There were numerous exercise and diet plans in my mind but none of them ever got implemented. Fortunately, we could do a nice little day trip thanks to my uncle, but that was the one and only highlight of my so-called vacation between jobs. But I have to go on this way until I find a house worth buying, before the property rates soar well above our "aukaad". Just to make this post not look so sad, I'm gonna end it with pretty pictures I took during the trip to Tamhini ghat.

Yes, it was a four-lane road when we began... then it trickled down to an almost-two-lane ghat.

We saw such beauty while driving down... to no particular destination.

So we had to park our car...

...and get our feet in there!

Even the rocks couldn't help but sustain life!

We drank the water from this tiny spring trickling down the stones. And the water was pure bliss. Did I mention that the water taps in house brought in murky water? But this was pristine!

A lonely, half-dead tree amongst the greenery. This fella would also sprout into more branches a while later. It was just the beginning of monsoon!

That's a river bed, my friends, and those aren't people potty training, those are barks of trees that grew out of there decades ago.

One of the few cute little stray mushrooms we encountered.

This is where we made our final halt...

...before turning back to the way home.

And on the return journey, this is what gave us company all along.

So we took some pits stops, yet again ;-)

Oh, and all this was accompanied by a sumptuous meal of misal-poli, kaanda-bhaji, and steaming hot chai and coffee :D Basically, this whole trip made up for the relaxation and rest that I couldn't get during my vacation. Now, when I get my car, you know where to find me on weekends. Not to forget: for all the inconvenience and irritating things and people that overwhelmed me, this was the one good thing that made me feel euphoric.
He he eh eheh!
Sorry, but that's the latest addition to my peculiar habits--the villainous laugh.

The universe (still) speaks to me

I got the answer I was seeking from the universe in my previous post. Around the same time that I felt this strng urge to get the feeling out of my system, the Hyderabad blasts took place.
Pasting the news article here so that it isn't lost when they delete the piece:

Bomb blasts rock Hyderabad, 5 killedPTI
[FRIDAY, MAY 18, 2007 03:10:03 PM]
HYDERABAD: Five persons were killed and four others, including two children, were injured when a bomb exploded in the historic Mecca mosque in the Charminar area of the old city here. The bomb exploded when thousands of people were gathered in the mosque for Friday prayers, DCP South Zone, Kanta Rao said. The bomb exploded around 1.30 PM and people ran outside in panic. Stones were pelted at the nearby shops and police personnel by an angry group of people. The local Majlis MP, Asauddin Owaissi, however, claimed that six people had died and 15 were injured seriously. The Mecca mosque is historic, said to be over 400 years old, and considered holy by people of Hyderabad, the rest of Andhra Pradesh and elsewhere. Andhra Pradesh Chief Minister Y S Rajshekhar Reddy, who is in Delhi, talked to the DGP Basith and other senior state government officials and took stock of the situation. Home Minister Jana Reddy said that police reinforcements are being sent to the area and the situation would be brought under control. Police were yet to identify the people who could have been behind the blast. They said an unattended bag has been found from the spot. Police Commissioner Balwinder Singh told reporters on the spot that the bag has been sent for defusing. Most of the injured have been admitted to the Osmania hospital. Four of them are in a serious condition, Dr Sreenivas of the hospital said.

Baawaraa mann

Everything seemed normal this morning till I reached office and sat at my desk. Then I opened GMail to check the usual mails and be online on GTalk. I noticed that the friend I usually talked with wasn't online and so called him. We had a nice long chat. It's past lunch time now, and still there's not a thing out of place. But ever since that moment when I logged onto my workstation this morning, my mind has been shivering. I have no idea what it is about, but I am disturbed. Once I got back to my desk, after talking to the friend I mentioned before, I heard the strains of the song "Baawaraa mann..." (Hazaaron Khwaishein Aisi) coming from a colleague's desk. This song always grips me for some reason. I quickly opened a media player and added this song to the playlist, along with a few other good songs so as not to get bored. I have been working since, with the music playing in my eardrums, but something's wrong. I'm feeling so full of some unexplainable emotion that I wanted to cry. In fact, I did. Just a few minutes back. I could take it no more. I turned on the aforementioned song on full volume into my earphones, covered my eyes, and shed a few tears. I have this huge feeling of something being wrong somewhere. And I know that I won't come to know what it is so soon. It may or may not be related to me, or someone very close to me, but something's happening. I don't even want to hope that it isn't too bad, for I feel that it's unavoidable and it's happening for a reason. The feeling was so strong that I had to get it out of my system. That is why this post. Maybe nothing happens. And then, in a couple of days, I might just delete this post. But for now, it stays.
:(

My mental radar started working and trying to scan the universe to know what's happening. I took a cue from the song, and my sudden strong urge to listen to it repeatedly. Till now I hadn't seen the movie and didn't even bother to know what it is about. I looked at IMDB and came to know it was about the political crisis that occurred in my country a few decades ago. Now, the song has got nothing to do with politics. But I'm just trying to guess the connection of all this with my state of mind--anything wrong going to happen in India's political scene? Anything that affects our lives adversely? But then, why am I emotionally unstable due to it? Politics is the last thing I want to think or know about. Seriously. Most politicians disgust me. Knock, knock, universe? Any answers? Till then, I'm off to some Googling. And work. That doesn't stop for anyone.

Addendum:

• Oh, well. Another piece of news for me. Till now, I never realized, inspite of listening to this song umpteen times, that it was sung by Shubha Mudgal, not a man!
  Oops! Just double-checked... there is a version of the song sung by Swanand Kirkire, a man :D I like Shubha's version too. She has a very strong voice and I like that!
  
• A search for "shivering mind" on Google for images gave me two things that caught my eye: the first image above (titled humpback_whale_lips, which is self-explanatory), and the second one here at the end. I liked both :) But none of them give me an answer. Guess I'll give up and get back to full-fledged work now.

So I can't resist. So here are the lyrics:

Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna

Bavre Se Mann Ki Dekho Bavri Hain Baatein
Bavre Se Mann Ki Dekho Bavri Hain Baatein
Bavri Se Dhadkaane Hain, Bavri Hain Saansen
Bavri Si Karwaton Se Nindiya Door Bhaage
Bavre Se Nain Chaahe, Bavre Jharokhon Se, Bavre Nazaron Ko Takna
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna

Bavre Se Is Jahan Main Bavra Ek Saath Ho
Is Sayani Bheed Main, Bas, Haathon Mein Tera Haath Ho
Bavri Si Dhun Ho Koi, Bavra Ek Raag Ho
Bavri Si Dhun Ho Koi, Bavra Ek Raag Ho
Bavre Se Pair Chahen, Baavron Tarano Ke, Bavre Se Bol Pe Thirakna
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna

Bavra Sa Ho Andhera, Bavri Khamoshiyan
Bavra Sa Ho Andhera, Bavri Khamoshiyan
Thartharati Lau Ho Maddham, Bavri Madhoshiyan
Bavra Ek Ghooghta Chahe, Haule Haule Bin Bataye
Bavra Ek Ghooghta Chahe, Haule Haule Bin Bataye
Bavre Se Mukhde Se Sarakana
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna

Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna
Bavra Mann Dekhne Chala Ek Sapna

When we announced

... our upcoming wedding to the team at office, we (read "I") thought that we should add a bit of flavor to it. There was no wedding invitation card that we planned to send out, because we weren't inviting anyone, because the wedding was to take place in his far-off home town, because we didn't expect anyone to attend, because we ourselves wouldn't want to do all that traveling. Well, so we ordered a nice big Black Forest pastry-cake to make the very much expected announcement a little more interesting.
So why am I posting these 4 months after the wedding? Simply because I installed Picassa and am loving the neat little collage it creates for me :o)

Edited to add: I forgot to mention it gives this kickass feature of creating posts for Blogspot right from within its own UI. However, the last time I tired it, Picassa didn't allow me to use more than 4 pictures in a post... but that could be due a limitation on the size of upload... will work that out, but otherwise it's a pretty cool tool!!

PS: The pictures have been taken by one of my colleagues with her Sony Walkman phone. Kewl na? I think she did as fantastic a job as her camera!

The rooftop becons

Here's what it looks like

... from the rooftop on the building that is our present home (no, the yellow one is the millionaire neighbor's).

There is a bird

... or two, who can almost touch the beauty of the evening

... or more, who take a little along of everything that they pass through!

And then, there is the moon

... the husband

... and the lights to make the dusk complete!

Lightning captured!

Need I say more?

[Big devilish grin!!! :D]

For those interested in more (and just because I can't contain my excitement), see http://picasaweb.google.com/pallavigsharma/LLC01.

Being yourself

Picture courtesy: www.shutterandpupil.com/images

Yet again I quote from Like the Flowing River by Paulo Coelho, a poem, which itself is quoted. Originally written by Mitsuo Aida, a Japanese poet and calligrapher, here's what it says...

Because it has lived its life intensely

the parched grass still attracts the gaze of passers-by.

The flowers merely flower,

and they do this as well as they can.

The white lily, blooming unseen in the valley,

does not need to explain itself to anyone;

it lives merely for beauty.

Men, however, cannot accept that 'merely'.



If tomatoes wanted to be melons,

they would look completely ridiculous.

I am always amazed

that so many people are concerned

with wanting to be what they are not;

what's the point of making yourself look ridiculous?



You don't always have to pretend to be strong,

there's no need to prove all the time that everything is going well,

you shouldn't be concerned about what other people are thinking;

cry if you need to,

it's good to cry out all your tears

(because only then will you be able to smile again).

This also reminds me of an old post, and by the way, this chapter in the book, titled Meeting in the Dentsu Gallery also mentions synchronicity: the author is paid a visit by the son of the Japanese poet, whose poem he narrates.

Also an expert from the end of the chapter...

"I want to be someone capable of seeing the unseen faces, of seeing those who do not seek fame or glory, who silently fulfil the role life has given them.
I want to be able to do this because the most important things, those that shape our existence, are precisely the ones that never show their faces."

I don't know what exactly this means to me at this point of time, but I'm sure the mystery will unfold in the days to come. There's something significant about to happen in my life too.